#1 Secret to the Life of Your Dreams

by Carol Hess on December 1, 2011

I’ve said it here before, and I’ll say it again.  I’m a late bloomer.  It took me longer than I care to admit to figure out the number one secret to getting my dream life.

But once I figured it out, wow!  I was a happy camper.

Is it really that simple?  Yes, it is.  Does it really work?  Yes, it does.

Does this secret work for every dream?  Yes.

Weight loss?  Yes.

Romance?  Yes.

Financial abundance?  Yes.

(Insert dream.)  Yes.

What’s the catch?  No catch.

Do you want to know the #1 secret to the life of your dreams?

Are you ready?

Are you sure?

Okay, here it is.

Drum roll please. . . . .

You’ve got to give yourself permission to dream.

Hey, don’t shoot the messenger!  I told you it was simple.

But guess what?  It may be simple, but it isn’t quite as easy as it sounds.  Not by a long shot.  It isn’t easy to let yourself dream – I mean really dream.  The kind of dream that is so vivid you can feel it, touch it, smell it, taste it, hear it.  The kind of dream that is right there behind your eyes even while you’re taking the garbage out or cleaning up a hairball on the brand-new living room rug.  (Okay, I admit I lose my dream when I’m doing hairball duty.  I’m only human after all.)

Strike One

The first strike you have against you when it comes to dreaming your dream life into existence is you are an adult.  By now, you have been told so many times to stop dreaming and get back to work that your dream catcher is rusty, if not downright broken.

If it’s rusty, you aren’t even sure if what you are dreaming about is what you really want.  Maybe you are still settling for what you think is realistic instead of what your heart and soul truly desire.  Or, if your dream catcher is broken (and you are not alone), you don’t even know what the life of your dreams looks like or how to figure out what it is.

Strike Two

The second strike you have against you is you’ve been disappointed so many times in the past.  You are afraid of dreaming because you don’t know if you can survive one more lost dream, one more disappointment, one more breaking your promise to yourself.

One of my biggest dreams is to lose my excess weight and keep it off – a dream I’ve had my entire adult life.  My wise woman inner voice is telling me the time has come to achieve that dream, but her gentle murmuring is drowned out by the loud and strident voice telling me to get real.  “Carol, if you haven’t done it before, you sure as heck aren’t going to do it now.  Just forget about it the blankety blank weight and move on.”

Strike Three

The third strike you have against you is you don’t think you deserve the life of your dreams.  You’ve been brainwashed to think it’s selfish to dream, especially if you’re a woman.  You’ve got other people’s dreams to take care of.  Their dreams are more important than yours.  Maybe someday you can focus on your dreams, but not now.  Besides, just who the heck do you think you are?  You need to get off your high horse.  You’re getting too big for your britches.  (Isn’t it interesting how many ways we have of telling ourselves and each other to give up on our dreams and stay small?)

When I was a kid, I used to go crabbing on the Eastern Shore of Maryland.  And I noticed something odd about the crabs I caught.  There would always be one crab in the bucket who would try to crawl out, but the other crabs would pull it back down.  There’s always someone who wants you to stay in the bucket where they think you belong.

Not Out of the Game

So, with three strikes against you, are you out of the dreaming game?  No, I have faith in you.  I know you can dream again.  But first you have to give yourself permission to do so.

Here’s your permission slip.  Fill it out.  Print it and put it somewhere where you’ll see it frequently.  And allow yourself to dream.

Permission to Dream

I, (your name),

hereby give myself permission to dream!

Effective date:  Today
Expiration date:  Never

And one last thing.  You are never too old, too fat, or too anything else to dream.  Dream.  Dream big.  You are worth it.

by Carol Hess


Categories Dream Catching, Personal Empowerment, The Art of Star Polishing, The Mind Game

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

avatar Sandi Amorim December 1, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Well, you know I’m taking you up on this challenge Carol! I’ve spent years helping others realize their dreams and forgot about my own for awhile. A couple of years ago I saw this gorgeous handmade chair (really a piece of art!) and around the edge of the chair was carved, “I sit here and I dream.” That chair made me cry because it was in that moment I realized I hadn’t been giving my own dreams a voice. The chair was quite expensive but I promised myself that I would go back and buy it for myself. Perhaps that is the first dream to come forward!


avatar Carol Hess December 1, 2011 at 11:13 pm

Well, Sandi, they do say we teach (or coach) what we most need to learn ourselves. So maybe it is indeed time to buy your Dreaming Throne and start catching those dreams.


avatar Nikki Groom December 1, 2011 at 3:45 pm

Ha, love this, Carol!

I want out of the bucket!!


~Nikki xo


avatar Carol Hess December 1, 2011 at 11:12 pm

Me too! We’ll climb together. :)


avatar jules - big girl bombshell December 3, 2011 at 9:50 am

Oh thank you for the reminder. I hate to admit that Strike Two and Three seem to have the loudest voices lately……..I think I will take that permission slip to heart and start moving toward those inner voice dreams……..


avatar Carol Hess December 3, 2011 at 8:23 pm

So glad you are going to move toward those inner voice dreams. That’s music to my dreamcatching ears, Jules. There’s something very powerful about stating such an intention publicly. The Universe takes notice and helps out. You’re on your way. Thanks for joining the conversation here at Star Polisher.


Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: